Thursday, August 31, 2006

Oops..I did it again...

This post is again gonna be about the main hero (or heroine??) in my blog. My mobile phone. I don't know why these nokia mobiles have a love-hate relationship with me. I love them...They hate me. They are forever trying to lose themselves, throw themselves outta my hand or pocket sometimes to the middle of a road, or elope with some one.

This time again, my latest mobile played seductress and made some unwitting fellow a thief. Whenever I am in an alien land(this time chennai), I try to be the smart alec and decide that I would start speaking the language in a week..Even reading it off bus boards. To make life easier still, I wont even get myself a 'Teach yourself Tamil in 30 days' book. Oh no, I am a genius. I am like Antonio Banderas in 'The 13th Warrior' where he could master speaking in some goddamned language within a night. (btw, isn't he the coolest?? With each facial hair that he shed in 'The Mask of Zorro' , I kept falling deeper and deeper in love with him..Sigh..deeper sigh...)

ha..So..Where was I..This time before I embarked on my MBA course in IIT-Madras, I made my very reluctant dad buy me a new nokia 2610 mobile. Quite a sleeky one.. Maybe it dint like its new owner. Just 1 month after I get to IIT, this shameless mobile tempt some innocent passerby waiting at the guindy bus stop. Cant really blame the fellow if he snatched the chance to unzip my bag while I was busy reading the bus board (written in Tamil..I know aa, pa, tha, ma, va, ka in Tamil script) and made off with my 1 month old cell. By the time I realized, I was on board a bus and 6 km away from the bus stop.

As the title of the post denotes this is 2nd time I am losing my cell. The first time was in pune. I was testing the shock absorbers of my Honda activa on pune roads (read gutters). My then mobile, a curvy sexy nokia 3220, tried doing a somersault from my pocket into the road while I was maneuvering a pothole in a way which would have put a seasoned mud biker to shame. Just as it did this despicable attempt to elope, I stopped my lean and mean machine some 5 meters down the road and rushed back to pocket her. But in that 30 nanosecond, some other poor benevolent soul decided to give shelter and care to my temporarily homeless mobile.

Now I have a nokia (yaa.. I never learn) 6070. My classmates have placed bets with each other on the number of weeks it is gonna last. I am scared that one of them would pocket the mobile in a desperate attempt to win the bet. When I voiced my concern, they assured me that it would never come to that... I wont be in possession of the new mobile till then for them to carry out these actions. With such confidence in my abilities, is it a surprise that I never fail their expectations??

I am gonna do a mrityunjaya homam for my new cell. Now I don't ever let it outta my sight..Carry it around tied in a string around my neck. Lets see if it would help. pls god..pls god.. I'll be a thoroughly good girl from now on... Don't do a "onze, douze, treize.. allez allez allez"with me..

Friday, August 04, 2006

On why I hate green

" I have a green member" my team lead (TL) told me very proudly.

Those of u who think I have started writing titillating stuff ..Hold on.. u haven't heard the whole story yet.

It was one of those days when I started feeling more like an old hag than a yuppie professional. Well, that is the only reason that I can give to my sense of color and attire. Maybe I was trying to cheer myself up wearing neon green t-shirt and a army green jeans with yellow patches. Now now..Don't go ahead and judge me.. Sometimes, I just feel like stealing the thunder from the black and green mainframe screen.

I walk into office and I see smirks, eyebrows raised... I feel pleased. Mission accomplished.

At that point of my professional life I was devoting my time and energy babysitting a batch of programs while they executed and did all sorts of mischeifs and basically report them back to the onsite fellas. If the report goes as 'green' ...Great...If the report goes as yellow or red.. I don't give a damn. I am like the talamasca members in Anne Rice novels (those who read the vampire chronicles and related, might understand).. I just stand back, observe and yawn.. Don't interfere.

but myTL belongs to the ' I take responsibility for my work' category.. He had been trying to instill in me the power of green and stuff.. And had lately given up. He saw me trotting over and mumbled something like "wish I could see that color in the report" or something similar...

Lucky day.. The report came out green. A moment of joy and celebration.. I call my TL over .. ask him to look at the report and pinch himself..throw in an indirect remark on how my feedback form should look very promising... how I should be given lesser work load.. and the usual grievances..

Amidst the congratulatory pats on the back and high fives.. He throws in the aforementioned revelation..

I stand there gaping.. Ok, I once had a crush on this guy.. I had described him as Amul Baby to a friend which he could have overheard. But all that doesn't warrant this..

Me (in rightful indignation) : sir, I really didn't want to know that...

TL (perplexed): huh? know what?

Me : what u said right now... (hmmph the nerve of the guy)

TL : that I have a full green team member now???

Me (realization dawning on me) : OHH... team..team member..

At this point, I think he realizes what I must have heard (or not heard) and just walks off with a dejected sigh..