And I am outta here...

Last day in office... Not very surprisingly, I am not teary eyed or feeling mushy. I am just concerned about the money(which ofcoz I would have to get from my parents) that I have to spend to browse internet,chat, blog,orkut... All these activities that I have been doing for free till now.. hmm.. And yes, free coffee...And thinking of things that I would sorely miss(coz I am going home)...

• staying with my room-mates..
• getting home after midnight..n late parties
• late night movie shows with friends..
• mac donalds/pizza hut/shiamak davar institute dance classes
• impulse shopping to the tune of thousands
• eating out every other night
• weird experimentational cooking
• not tidying up my room/cupboard/kitchen
• wearing clothes too tight/short/low
• treasure hunt every night (my mom would remember where exactly I put my stuff)
• pyjama parties
• waiting for the last day of every month for the paycheque.
• free internet, free internet, free internet
• A/c cabin in this scroching heat from 9 to 5.
• jamuns (the purple sour n sweet ones), pears, apricots, peaches,strawberries,lychees,mulberries and all other fruit varieties that I haven't ever seen sold by roadside vendors in trivandrum
• the occasional trekking,parasailing,horse riding trips with friends.

waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh...I am too sad already.. Pass me the tissue please.sniff sniff..pffffttt..Thank you..

I was sneaking around with a friend's digicam trying to get pictures of my office and not look like someone who would sell it to international terrorists given a chance. But couldn't click much.. People really don't like flashes in their eyes when they are coding. They also complained that I take too much time setting the camera angles and other finer details that they develop cramps being in the same pose. hmmph..No wonder we don't have any super models here..

going home..2 months... haaa... I am sure I'll be bored to death..

p.s. this is not meant to be a post..Was trying time pass blogging to kill time (what else?). Comments like 'go fly a kite, get a life' would put your life in great danger. (have I told you that I know voodoo???)

Case of the missing mobile and toilet flush

Last weekend I spent 1 hr flushing the closet in my bathroom to locate my cell phone. Weird technology??? No, just really absent minded room mate. Before any of u reading this blog (peeheee..ppl reading this blog, whom am I kidding.. I am talking abt me, myself and some dear colleagues of mine whom I bribe to read this) jump into any hasty conclusion, my roomie did not eat the cell phone and then let nature take its path. It was not in the closet to begin with. Now that I have built up an interesting (do I hear ppl snickering?) scene, let me fill in the history and details..

I live with 3 other equally socially incompetent people.. No, that was really mean. They are socially very competent, but try to be on par with me when they are at home with me. Losing cell phones is a daily event. People who can lose something in addition to cell phones and find them before the next morning are considered champions. Reigning champion is SweDi who manage to lose her specs, cell,hair band,hand bag, comb,apartment keys and dupatta in one go. Next would be me. I try topping SweDi with cell phone, charger, bike keys...But in vain.

After 12 o' clock in the night, when everyone is home...We organize the search party.. It is jolly good fun throwing stuff all around trying to find the treasure. By the time we find it, we might have accidentally buried something else and it becomes the treasure for the next day. Don't be fooled that our neighbor's suffer this hullaboo in silence. At about 1 o' clock, we get the routine call from the security guard down stairs to keep our voice down.. We take turns attending the call too..

Security guard (SG): madam, do I have to say this every night?..

me: huh?? What?? U don't really have to wish us good night.

sg: no, to keep ur noise down. It is 1 o clock in the night. One needs to sleep, you see...

me: hey, u r on night duty... I should report this to the society chairman.

sg: no, not me, madam.. I stay awake.. Other people needs to sleep. They shout at me.

me: they shout as well??

sg: yes, they shout ..

me: see, its coz of them then... Its the collective noise which makes it unbearable..I was thinking of calling you up to complain.

sg:(seeing this is getting nowhere) just keep it down please

me: what?? The phone??

sg: (heavy sigh)..no..The noise..ugh..Do whatever u want.. Good night.

me: (patronizing tone) see I told u that u don't have to wish us good night every night..So sweet .

similar exasperatingly obtuse conversation happens everyday.. Well, about the toilet and cell phone treasure hunt. This time, I lost my cell phone.. No I did not exactly lose it.. I clearly remember keeping it along with the daily newspaper in the living room and when I came back after sometime, it was not there.. Paper n phone..All swoosh.. Into thin air. Now the main requirement for this hunt is that nobody shud have any idea where the lost item is. To make it even more fun, they shud come up with contradicting memory shots.

tracking cell phones are easier compared to other items. Due to its ringing tone facility.. But woe befall you if u ever happen to keep it in silent and then go ahead and lose it. Well, I asked my other room mate(AnPal) who wasn't very keen to hunt to keep on giving missed calls in my number and we started scourging the apartment.

After half an hour of searching SweDi decides to use the Jane (we don't call our loo as John) and seconds later she scrambles out crying Eureka... Along with the flush she can hear the cell ringing.. Now, me, SweDi and ReSin are all huddled around the flush straining to hear the ringtone 'Jalak Dikhlaa Jaa' (so very apt) along with the flush. And, we can...!!!

We make SweDi go over each and every item of food that she ate that evening and don't find cell phone as an item. In between we keep flushing to entertain ourselves with the ringtone.. 1 hour of flushing and a half empty sanitary tank later, we find that the song is coming from the window next to the closet. Peer thru the window and we find our waste basket in the hallway singing happily and vibrating as well..(by some weird coincidence AnPal was giving missed calls exaclty the same time we flush)

Case solved. SweDi had scrounged up the newspaper(along with my phone) when she spilled milk on it and put it out in the dustbin in an attempt to clean up the living room. Next week, she says she is gonna tidy up the whole house.. Hope we still have our T.V. after that happens.

Misquoted...

"So..You wanna leave all these..and a pay cheque at the end of every month and study for 2 years??" With that she did a sweeping action across the room with her hands. All I could see in that otherwise empty board room was some cluttered chairs, a white board with words 'synergy', 'effective work', 'people centric', 'soft skills' and more such 'management' words written on them. I didn't think I would miss that.. Thru the glass walls of the room, I could see people poking at keyboards.. Most of them bespectacled.. None of them looked as if having a great time.

I was having my 'Associate Expectation Feedback' meeting. Fancy name for a talk where they try to bully/cajole/coax/blackmail/beg u to stay back in the company. But they knew it was useless with me.. I had made up my mind. Have had enough staring into black and green screens. In one moment of frustration I think I even said I wanted to play with some other type of software...called ideas. But then, what is so new abt a engineering-graduate-of-any-college-with-any-specialization-turned-software-engineer-aspiring-for-better/MBA/Onsite situation? Me?? I am the MBA variety.Nothing else will do.

So I hoped and prayed ..and maybe studied at times too, for a miracle which would entitle me for a seat for an MBA course in IIM.. ButI guess GOD was listening a bit too hard.. He gave me something more.. A seat in IIT-M. (its just an alphabet more...The rest is ranging from mediocre to better than average).

"How did u find ur tenure with us?".. I cut short my flashback to concentrate on the question at hand. RS, the one who is taking my feedback is looking at me quizzically.. "good, very good, extremely satisfying".. She went on..

"OK-ish.. I suppose, I don't have any major grievances", i replied.
She looked real happy to hear that. "ha !" ..and made a tick against 'extremely satisfied'..

"How was the office atmosphere like?? friendly?Colleagues??" she probed..
"Well.. i wasn't sexually harrassed..but with frequent shifting of teams and practically no team activities, i barely know the names of all my team mates to call them friends".

'hmm.." and she wrote something in the book, which turned out to be 'Atmosphere in office highly conducive for effective work and extremely safe for female associates'.

"That's....thats not what i meant"....i protested mildly. "This is just for official purposes. u go on.tell me, y exactly are u resigning?"

I wondered if saying the reason of higher studies a couple of times more would make her believe that i am quitting coz i really do want to be unemployed for 2 years and not coz i have some better job offer in my kitty.

"Coz i got into IIT-Madras for MBA". i replied with a straight face.
"Good. good. and ur native place is quite closer to Madras,right? Isnt that y u r leaving? Closer home? eh?"
i thought i would give in.. i had a good mind to tell her that even if the institute was in Jammu & Kashmir, i would have gone.. but then, that would lead to further qns...
"Yes.. quite close by.. i can just jump over" ..
"Ah"and she wrote next to reason for resignation as 'want to be closer to home'. (What am i? A homing pigeon?).

"Would u be coming back? After you are done?" (done what?? being closer home??)
"i dont suppose so"
"No? Dont u like it here?" ..she looked insulted. And genuinely disappointed that i wont be coming back...
"Uh..coz this is basically a s/w company. There is nothing much for an Management graduate to do here.. i have talked to some in this company itself and ..they say, they dont even have a job"...

"mm..ok". she said finally..Finally, i could get my point across.. was gonna give myself a pat on the shoulder I when i saw the entry on the form 'wanna work in small management companies rather than big technology driven ones'.. hmmph..

"Why did u write it that way?" i couldn't control myself any longer..
"Well.. if we cant help our attrition rates, atleast the associate satisfaction survey should show a rosy picture.. " she smiled beatifically, wished me a good day and left...