1st house on left, Down Memory Lane.

parents are queer people..i guess..all our lives we try to figure them out. and they reciprocate the curiosity and concern by trying to figure (read it as fix) us out. by the time we get a hang of things, in all probability, we have another bunch of weirdos trying to do the same on us..oh ya!! our kids.the vicious circle of life.

case in point - my parents.. yes, ofcourse.. i love them to bits and all that. but at times i wonder..how would have i turned out, if i was born in some other household.

my dad is the strong proponent of the idea that a child's most active brain cell development takes place during the time he/she is in the 3-7 age group. he never gave up trying to develop those non-existant cells of mine during that time and later.. he never got very far.. but true to his character, he played it fair and tried the same stuff on my younger sis as well. he still tries his tactics with my nephews and nieces, alas, with similar results.

some of the activities included :

mechanical toys - not the colorful ones, but the serious fix-it-yourself-if-you-wanna-play types. needless to say, those lay discarded, while me and my sis played with the cardboard boxes they came in. we were very ingenious kids..the most mundane stuff would be our play things.. oh! if only i count recount the number of times my mom had to buy new bedsheets and curtains coz we tried making paperman cut outs in them.chuck those lego blocks... the red LPG cylinder,used coconut husk, thrown away drawstrings, pens, slippers.. we could spend hours playing with them..

next in line was the formula food that dad got with much difficulty from his yankee friends. now, i was never a problem kid as far as food is concerned. no tantrums there..put it in my mouth and i'll chew it dutifully. sis on the other hand was a picky eater. she had no sense of appreciation for all this firangi stuff.. she decided to go raw.. worms that is. lunchtime was hunting time for her. she'd be out in the playground with a twig sharpened to be her one pronged fork and poke at unsuspecting worms, stab the ones that caught her fancy...and slurp..its gone.. mom had a tough time making food look like worms and squished bugs to get her to eat.

mind stimulating games followed the regimen.now, it did not matter a bit that dad was a chess/badminton champion and mom a baskie player.. i apparently dint inherit any of those gene sets. despite the painful efforts to appreciate the game of chess, my chess playing ability was (and is) limited to smashing the pieces together, picking out what has fallen and then repeating the same motion..he did have some luck in badminton though.. but not so much to claim as a feat.

finally dad struck a goldmine..books.it started out as the daily night time read-to-sleep ritual. he finally realised that, i never can sleep until it came to 'the end'. so very cunningly, he would read the first half of the story to me.. and then leave it at that..so that i am compelled to read the rest by myself. i got so enchanted by the books.. that it dint stop at night time stories. he enrolled me in all the libraries in the city.. took me around for the weekly quota of books. but then, one big glitch - as a 6 yr old i was reading Enid Blyton.. 10 yrs- Enid Blyton still.. 15 yrs - oh ya!! Enid still.

now..dont u go assuming that mom remained a spectator in this personality development arena. she was in charge of the interpersonal skills section. on that, she had to handle the extremes with us two kids.. i was a tomboy and my sis a hide-in-closet kind. on a regular basis she handled cases of me biting other bullies/non-bullies in kindergarten and sis crying when asked any question in class. she had to train me to shut my mouth when i feel like biting and shouting and open sis's when asked to say something and not just whimper. phew..

one incident she recollects of trying to housebreak me on the 'small talk' protocol is the 'How do you do?' one. Days after days of training me on the correct way to answer a 'How do you do?' with a similar 'How do you do?'.. i finally get a chance to put my skills to test...An unsuspecting friend of dad who came visiting shook my chubby 4 yr old hand and said 'How do you do?'.. my chest swelled up in anticipation as i became aware of my mom's eyes resting on me.. and confidently i belted out

"Howdukudu"

"eh..what baby?"

"Hakidomudooo"

"..".(.the guys looks around for help.)

"hadakudapoooooo" (by now i am screaming at the top of my lungs and baring my fangs in a way my mom knows too well.. ya! i am ready to bite)

mom swooped in and picked me up, thereby rescuing that poor guy of mortal danger.

why a sudden trip down the memory lane.. u ask? well..am back in the cradle of life-my home.. for 12 whole days..and these are some of the excerpts from the stories that my parents enthrall poor visitors with..this and other very unflattering ones... like the time i cried on stage due to stage-fright during my speech.. or the time i tried to kill my sleeping sis by building a tomb of pillows on top of her... or the time..... oh no!! i cant tell you that..

bye for now.. have to convince my mom that no amount of coconut oil hair massage is gonna rid me off the maroon and copper hair streaks...and that snug-fit jeans does not cut off blood circulation to my limbs....s'long...

Cream..bumps...and a Ghost from Past..

There i was, washing icing sugar & cream & candied peanut bits off my face, thinking of the pimple which would appear the next day...

It was my birthday, and i got creamed by my friends..narrowly escaped my rear being smashed to pulp to the general glee of public in name of birthday bumps.. a XXXL kurta from the pandavas (was that a hint or a direct statement to lose weight??)... n i was back in my hostel picking bits of peanuts off my hair (the cake was butterscotch with candied peanut topping)

"U got fat"..i spun around to see who the hell is talking to me like that.. i saw a girl, in her teens maybe, vaguely familiar.. she looked disappointed seeing me.
"huh..excuse me", i said.

"u heard me.. u got fat.. 10 years and u still couldnt get into shape?" she is near shouting now..
"who the hell are u?", attack is the best form of defense..

"what?? now i have to introduce yourself to you?? i am you"..
"......"maybe the peanut bit in my nostril had gone up to my brain.. i am hallucinating.. what is going on?? is she nuts?? am i nuts???

"i see that u have become no wiser too.. i am you.. 10 years back.. remember..your 15th birthday..the whole list you wrote down..things to accomplish before you were 25.. i wanted to see how you are doing"
Realization seeps in through the non-porous matters of my head and finally dawns on me.. OMG! no wonder she looked familiar..she is the same girl in my school album.. and what was the list she is talking about.. i dont make lists of things to do..

"so..first.. are you a CEO or something near that yet?""first of all.. i cant believe i was that dumb to think that i would be a CEO or something near by 25.. and no, i am not one yet.. i am a realist now".. (i had already prepared myself for a long night).

"hmm..ok..then what are you now? you have job, right?"
"umm..err..no..i had one..left it..for intellectual improvement..i am back to being a student now"

"ok..something better than nothing i guess.. where but?? IIM? surely your are not still doing your graduation"
"wee..eell..not exactly IIM.. it is IIT...n dont get me started on y i think it is a great school for MBA..believe me, we could go all night on that"

"it seems that you are in a mood to argue.. i like to sleep early..so let us make this snappy.. do u have a car/a few lakhs in bank account/ a swiss army knife?"
"i have a scooter bought from my savings... multiples of 1 lakh in account (multiplier being 0.1) and what the heck am i gonna do with a swiss army knife?"

"swiss army knife when you go backpacking off to the wilderness on your weekends...remember??"
"....."(i dint have the guts to say that my fav weekend activity was catching upon a week's sleep)

"have you mastered any of veena/violin/piano? did you complete that Bharatnatyam and Kathakali course? Did you pursue pencil sketching?"
"no..no and no..I tried a bit during my stint at Pune to resume the classes, but then had to leave it mid-way. Now dancing is limited to gyrations in parties. Sketching..hmm..limited to drawing on hostel wall and basic sketch for flower rangoli during Onam"

"you have a posh apartment overlooking the sea?""no..i now live in a 10x12 ft hostel room overlooking a basket ball court"

"You got friends who would stick with you through thick & thin"
(finally) "Yes..absolutely.."

"Oh..praise the lord that atleast something you dint fare that bad.. i guess, asking the rest of the questions is not gonna fetch much good..u tell me what you have been upto these 10 years"
"hmm..let me see, i got into the best college in my state for engineering on merit.. I almost cracked CAT but, then the exam was declared invalid that year..i had a blasting 2 years during my software engineer life at Pune... i made friends who later became my mentors, partners-in-crime and motivators..I never became a maestro in anything but i did try my hands in glass-painting (made my first sale there), horse-riding, swimming, learning salsa & jazz.. I made a difficult choice of giving up a well paying job and good career prospects and took a chance..I got over my stage fear while talking to a large gathering.. I made my parents' eyes swell up with pride more than once..I got over the sibling rivalry phase and realised that life would have been very dreary if not for a sister call your own.. I still get duped because i trust too much.. but i also wised up(?) from a bookworm-ish girl in a convent school to ...hmm..me..i had my share of tears & guffaws .. and i enjoyed the journey till here."

"blah..blah..blah..if nothing you now know how to baffle with bullshit.. but anyways, i guess you did ok.. but a Lambhorgini wouldn't have hurt, you know"
"Maybe in next 10 years"

"Ya..will check that up when i come see you next"
"what?? i dint make any list for the next 10 years this time"

"No.. this time you dint..but u did it at 15.. so, dont try to fool me..you are just fooling yourself."
and just as suddenly as she came... she was gone..

Some disturbing thoughts...

Case 1:
Finance class...by a renowned guest faculty.
the lecturer keeps the class amused with anecdotes and petty digressions from the topic at hand. While trying to explain how an MBA should think, he puts forward this:

Lecturer (L) : Suppose you run a business of selling pens. The cost for a pen u incur is Rs.10. and being the smart business man you are, you sell it at Rs. 20/-.. So what is the profit you make per pen???

Class (duh..simple math): Rs.10/- ..(some wise-crack talked about overheads and other indirect costs apportionment..which was ignored)

L: Business is doing good. One fine day, by chance, an old friend of yours walks in to the showroom. You exchange pleasantries, reminisces the good old days.. Reason for visit?? Oh, he wants a pen. You generously offer him one for Rs.15/- ..good old buddy and all that.. So what is the profit here?

Class(duhher... should've sent this guy to a math class) : Rs. 5/-

L (with the 'oh-i-gotcha-there' smile) : Nope..it is a loss of Rs. 5/-. This is the pen you'd have sold for Rs. 20 and had to sell at Rs.15 coz the bugger was your friend. So, coz ur friend walks into ur business, you make a lose being nice.

Guy in row behind mine : Superb!!!
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Case 2:

30 sec to class.. me huffing and puffing along like a mad dog..on way i ward off screeching monkeys and masticating deer. IIT life takes out the novelty of seeing such things. In the mornings, while i drag myself along to hostel mess to chew on over-burnt, elastic dosas and insipid gooey pongals... i've lost count of the number of times i have encountered a battalion of deer munching dew tipped grass with a look of detachment written well on those faces. turn your face up and you see a whole colony of monkeys on the hostel roof and sun shades fighting over the loot of the day.

ah..coming back to the topic.. on way, met friend of mine in similar condition.

Me: Morning Ho!!

Friend: hey.. was just gonna come over to your room before i realised how late i'm gonna be for the class.

Me: whazzup ?

Friend: you know..right after the exams we should go to that restuarant X, and have a plate of A and C.

Me: oh..ok. who else coming?

Friend: No one.. the curry serves only 2. last time i went there, i couldnt finish the curry off.. so i thought i'd bring someone along so that we can split the bill of the curry and not waste the stuff we pay for.

Me: noble thought there.. n i was thinking that you liked my company.
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At times i wonder, where did i land up..is this what the course ought to teach me? to evaluate each and every decision in life in monetary terms? to look out for the incremental 'value-addition' that a particular opportunity would offer?

i see people forming strategic alliances rather than genuine friendship. the driving force underneath most relationships is the 'take-away', rather than liking for each other... talk about relationships that endure!!!

People hide their accomplishments/achievements until the last moment to make a grand entry, so that no-one else can copy them and take away their edge over others. Some withhold information for this very competitive advantage.. talk about fair playing ground!!!

And there are others with the 'sole shepherd' syndrome. They contribute only if assured that the particular task is impossible without their co-operation. Put them in a team of equals or better, they shrink off their responsibilities and put their skills to better use elsewhere...talk about team-spirit!!!

But am i the blue eyed babe in woods still looking for innate goodness in people ??? Heck No!!! but still..i wonder.. is this what i want to be..???

18 Facts No-one Wanted to Know abt Me

Just picked this one up from a random blog i read.. so am passing this on dutifully ..

Qn.1. Pick out a scar you have, and explain how you got it.
hmm..have been looking all over my body..and i really cant find one.. wow, am i such a blemish-less beauty?? does it have to be a scar or would pimples do? if yes, then explanation is simple enuf..dairy milk fruits n nuts, without fail...every day.

Qn.2. What does your phone look like?
my current phone..the 5th one..with the longest track record of being with me without getting its sweet self stolen or lost (touch wood) is a nokia 6070. it has got scratches on the display..chipped paint on the scroll keys..and once in a while throws a tantrum. but love it nonetheless.

Qn.3. What is on the walls of your bedroom?
moi staying in hostel..so the paint color is rather imposed than designed by self. but i still try to brighten up my dull existence. on one side i have an Anne Geddes poster ... 8 topless bar dancers.. hehe..just 8 babies in their pyjamas holding on to a bar...right next to it, there is a thermocol sheet on which i have put up post-its of class schedule n pics of family n friends. also have some newspaper articles pasted on the wall..

on the other side, i have a color charcoal drawing of calvin n hobbes. calvin leaning on a tree tryin to look kewl n saying "the world bores u when u r cool".. n hobbes with a rather amused look... i drew this when i got really bored at 2 am in the morning.

Qn.4. What is your current desktop picture?
calvin & hobbes again..
http://www.rosenet.org/teensite/Calvin_and_Hobbes_comics_cartoons_f.jpg
needless to say, am a huge fan. even had an imaginary pet/friend/toy while growing up..the big eyed deer bambi.

Qn.5. Do you believe in gay marriage?
i believe you should spend ur life with whomsoever u want to..

Qn.6. What do you want more than anything right now?
some clarity in thought.. and a direction..
or maybe a time machine.. so that i could zip back into the past..relive my engg college days n see all my friends again.

Qn.7 . What time were you born?
Around 7.10pm. legend has it that i took my sown weet time coming out that my dad got tired of waiting and pacing the floor that he slept off in one of the chairs kept outside the labour room. my mom still blackmails him with this gross apathy that he exhibited.

Qn.8. Are your parents still together?
Very much so..

Qn.9.Last person who made you cry?
My friend here - Priya...when she tried to wake me up and smell the coffee.

Qn.10. What is your favorite perfume / cologne?
old spice.. not on me, but on others..sure fire way of getting me real close to a guy is dab him with old spice. brings out memories of childhood. when i'd go to my native place during summers. i used to play the FBI and dig up stuff from cellars and attics. one such excavations ended up with me opening an old trunk and finding an old spice after shave. the fragrance was intoxicating...n nothing like had experienced before. i hid the bottle for days until it was found and confiscated- only to sniff at regular intervals.

current flavor of the season is vanilla though.. makes me think of freshly baked cake. but i guess they dont make perfumes with that fragrance.

Qn.11. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex?
Doesnt really matter much.. but ceterus paribus, i'd like to stare into and drown in moss-green eyes.

Qn.12. What are you listening to?
Just the whirring sound of fan. Lectures during day time.

Qn.13. Do you get scared of the dark?
No..am not scared of the dark, ghosts, crawly things... but do pretend to be so at times..depending on whom i'm with ;)

Qn.14. Do you like pain killers?
what??? come again??

Qn.15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
Shy? well..my summer internship feedback form had my mentor writing in that i was rather shy. back in college, my classmates ROFLAO seeing it. guess that explains how shy a person i'm.

but asking someone out is not something i would do even if i want to.. not coz i am shy. just some weird sense of propriety which makes me think that it is always better to be asked for than ask.

Qn.16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?
the answer never changes... a piece of rich, dark, gooey chocolate cake.

Qn.17. Who was the last person you made you mad?
I get mad every Friday evening without fail.. coz thats the day i wanna go out and have some junk/comfort food..but cant. My mom had asked me to observe a 'no non-veg' fast on that day and in a moment of generosity i agreed to that.

Qn.18. Who was the last person who made you smile?
My friend back from college... got a call an hour back saying she is gonna get married soon. her excitement and happiness rubbed off a bit on me too.. :)

Wokie..now that i am done with the 18 qns, i hereby tag Sathya, Megha & Golu and the general public who may stumble upon this.

Spotlight or Nappies???

everywhere u look..provided u r looking at the newspapers, ibnlive, gossip columns...u'd see a scantily dressed britney spears... and the general population giving her expert advice. she has become the international 'throw ball to drown clown' that you see in fairs. though i detest the amount of quality media space that is given to irrelevant and unimportant events.. there is something that makes me ponder..

u have in front of ur eyes.. a woman [oops..something between a girl and a woman, going by her song] who let her career [ and common sense ] take a back seat to marry and to procreate... and then she tries to come back..

people speak of throwing away her career for what she thought was gonna be a happily ever after. i wonder, is career and domestic bliss mutually exclusive for a woman? how much of the criticism directed against her is really valid..rather than just the general spite?

true..she has put on weight and is outta shape. but then, she also had 2 kids.
true.. her dance movements are nothing like what it used to be. Compare it with the yesteryears VMA performances and the difference is mind numbing. Gone is the agile, flexible, nimble footed & spirited diva. The latest one showed her gasping to keep in pace with her co-dancers..n failing. You almost feel the angst thinking of the 'wasted' talent.

But this feeling of angst.. y is it always directed at the woman who wants to marry when in prime or near prime of their careers? y is it that they are thought to abandon a plum, exciting future for a tame life? U never see the public uproar when a guy gets married. and in corollary, when a woman do get married, y do we expect her professional life to take a back seat? y are highly successful women, perceived to have strained relationships with their spouses?

i can only pity britney.. she had made a couple of wrong choices in her life. i wonder how that is not possible when u r under media scrutiny all the time since u were a teenager. she ended up with a money-mismanaging husband, 2 kids, a shaved head and rehab - most of which i guess she dint plan to have. but then, braving it all, she is trying to be back where she felt the most comfortable.. and, she gotta convince the whole world.. that she still has it in her... more so now, than when she was trying to establish herself as a new entrant.. image make-overs are always so more difficult than just image making.

till she redeems herself, she would be talked about - with sniggers n tsk-tsks.. a price she has to pay for doing what she wanted... a price for trying to make a family while she should've broken more album sales record..

Lights..Camera...Action

if u ask me y i havent been active and regular since march...i'd say that 'i never intended to be'.. but then, i know that is just giving you a cheeky answer and not my li'l heart's desire..


three reasons i dint have any posts are
1. nothing much of catastrophic significance happened in my life of which i can write engagingly and wittily about (as i normally do)
2. i was far away from civilisation for a few weeks...was in the cradle of my life (trivandrum..home...aaah) after college finally closed after 1 year of torture and fun.
3. i am doing my summer internship at a place where they have blocked out gmail and orkut and i assumed wrongly that blogger wud be blocked as well..


now..pay attention to these reasons and commit them to memory coz for lack of better ones, i wud be recycling them whenever i feel the need to.


but, did i give my typing fingers (index fingers of both hands) some rest??? no.. i had been typing (what else did u think?) furiously away all this time.. to a very unhappy list of readers regarding my escapades in b'lore...
here goes some movie reviews from a few of the mails.....

the ordeal called 'shootout at lokhandwala'..for those of u fortunate souls who missed the movie...i'll tell u what it was -

step 1. i = 1

and x= (shoot,shoot,utter cuss words to the tune of 'teri maa ki.. teri behen ki..'..., dance in shady bars)

step 2. i=i+1

step 3. check if audience is dead.
step 4. go to step 1

now..if any of u wisecracks reply n tell me that the value of i fluctuates between 1 and 2..i am gonna never write a post again..(just kidding..i'm in this for life).

Pirates of Carribean

have anyone of u told bedtime stories to a 4 yr old who refuses to sleep..?? well..PoC 's script was written in a similar fashion.. i can imagin the story-writer narratin the story to the producer (the 4 yr old)..

SW:and then they go off on a big black ship..

Pr: (getting bored)..and then??

SW: suddenly, a storm appears...a whirlwind..zephyr..

Pr:(getting interested) and then..

SW: the captain starts rocking ship ..shifting the mass to and fro..ship sways.. the storm is nearer..the ship sways more..it is abt to topple..or will storm tear it to shreds..topple..storm..topple..storm..

Pr:(eyes aglaze...edge of the seat) and...and..

SW: so, u interested in makin this???

just when u think that is it..a new character, or a new twist appears.. sometimes, just to use the graphic effects..(the Comp Graph guy might have said :'hey director, i figured this kewl way to make a ship move on sand as if it is movin on waves....y dont u ask the scriptor to write that up in the story??')..

but all in all..a good movie..u see a deliciously sexy orlando bloom and a rag-picker look-alike johnny depp..just that once in a while, they and the rest of the crew could use a bath..

About Sharav...my hostel

for want of better things to post, i am copy-pasting the stuff that i contributed for the Hostel Mag.. donno if they would take in my contribution itself..

here goes..

"It’s about the tears we shed when we first came in bidding bye to parents/siblings..

It’s about the butterflies in stomach when we found ourselves being on our own…

It’s about those nights we lay awake reminiscing our lives back at home..

It’s about knowing your neighbour…from just a smile in the corridor to bang-the-door-open familiarity

It’s about joining your voice with the girl in the next bathroom doing a chorus of ‘awaaraa bawrein..’

It’s about timidly peeking into each of the toilets before half-heartedly selecting an almost-clean one

It’s about queuing up for the turn to use the washing-machine..and at times washing your laundry at 2 am to lose the queue…

It’s about kissing the whole washing process good-bye and BPO-ing it to ‘sir’ in the cycle shed

It’s about complaining about the thickness/staleness/rawness of rotis and thinness/blandness of dal in the mess

It’s about the dogs n their puppies whom many loving hands feed with biscuits and other tidbits everyday

It’s about counting the number of couples lost in a world of their own infront of the hostel from 9pm to 9am

It’s about arranging and re-arranging the furniture in an 8x6 ft room to make it more homely/functional

It’s about all those funny/weird/cute/nostalgic posters/hangings we stick/hang up on the walls

It’s about smiling in greeting to ‘helloo daa’ of the ‘akka’ in reception

It’s about holi which had the entire sharav in pink,green,blue,yellow,gold,silver and wet..

It’s about dandiya where the baski-court vibrates to the tempo of the dandiya sticks

It’s about the disco night which smelled of frankies and bubbled like a soft-drink

It’s about all those useful talks organized – with special mention of the grub as well

It’s about pouring down your cribs/invites/updates/lost n founds in the notice board

It’s about the hostel elections where you would be politely woken up from sleep that you have earned just after a night-out.

It’s about checking the coast clear of monkeys before getting out of your room

It’s about getting back in, whenever you want to, in the night and writing a one word reason in the register infront of the dozed off security guard

It’s about ‘Junta SAC is open’, ‘Room ### visitor waiting’ messages which fill the air throughout the day

It’s about the tears… the emptiness… the anxieties

It’s also about the laughter…the sharing..the fun…the freedom

It’s about.. SHARAV"

Crowning Glory...(past tense)

It's summer in chennai...and the heat waves started as early as Jan.. International Society for Irrelevant Findings and Research located at Germany has come up with the new theory that being subject to intense heat wave can have adverse effect on a person's memory power.. maybe that explains y i have been so dormant in coming up with new posts.

Summer used to be such a nice time in Kerala where i spent my growing years - time for mangoes, watermelons n Jawahar Balabhavans. It used to be the time when year after year my parents discovered how grossly underpaid the primary & secondary school teachers were. Quite a few times, they had tried sending me off to my aunt's place. Then fear of being disowned by close relatives led to an exponential decrease in the duration of stay..

I guess my deep inclination towards scientific experiments had an effect as well. I vaguely remember emptying bottles of tonics, powdered tablets,capsules, talcum powder, chilli powder etc. into the community well to see if the taste of water changes.. At some point of time, when i was much into developing my culinary skills, i had even tried to improve the crunchiness of dosas n chutneys by sprinkling a handful of sand over it. then there was the love for adventure sports - climbing trees, stealing mangoes, cashew nuts (from the neighbour's yard), fishing (neighbour's pond) & picking up fights. I was the uncrowned queen of tummybiting - my success-gauranteed tactic of winning any fights. Thus i grew up - darling of the masses..

Summer was also the time of the annual haircut.. when my mom would mercilessly drag me n my sis to a barber shop (not even a decent beauty parlor until we were about 12 or so) n ask the guy at the counter for "two Boycut please". I used to close my eyes, tears running down my chubby cheeks while the barber snipped off my cowslips n tresses. All those hindi film heroines with long tresses that the heros never get tired of caressing will flick through my mind adding to the agony. once my sis had seriously tried running away from home after such a hair cut. (i gave her my 5 bucks for the bus fare..) But unfortunately, the plan was discovered & the 5 rupee note confiscated.

Parents are so fickle minded, i say.. the same stuff they wanted us to do or not do in childhood..they reverse their stand when u reach maturity (ok..reaching maturity is too much to ask for in my case..i'll rephrase that to 'when u are outta childhood'). They wanted me to eat well when i was a kid, now it is "do u know that it is ur 5th laddoo???" even as i just hungrily eye the lone laddoo.. they wanted me to let go off my mom's pallu n talk to people when in a gathering. now they explain the neccesity of giving other's some time to atleast respond... Being a couch potato & not going out to play with friends was frowned up...the same way they frown on me spending too much time with friends now... same is the case with length of hair. When it used to be ubiquituous 'boy cut' during my primary school years ; the emphasis is now on 'grow as long as you can' hair. This to the extent that my mom complains of having high BP when i talk of getting my hair trimmed...parents..parents..tsk.tsk.. When do i figure them out?

One way i get around this is to change the style of the cut without changing the length much.. Hardly a difference to the casual observer (which includes a vast majority of the male population). But this time it was a different story altogether..

I am sitting in the parlor chair all caped up while the chingee looking hairdresser sprays what smells like pesticide on my hair. I have explained to her the absolute importance of retaining the length n she replies in a language which i believe resembles English. The operation starts. each n every strand of my hair is combed, re-combed, compared against other strands, cut, combed, re-combed and cut again. the process lasts for about 1 hr. i dont know if i had dozed off in the midst, coz the next thing i remember is she telling me "so how do u like it?".. i see in the mirror that she held out very expectantly towards me - the same style that i had before - albeit in a miniature form. she had happily chopped off 4 inches of my oiled-groomed-shampooed-conditioned effort. "Nice" - i say thru clenched teeth..

I just wanna get outta there.. I run to the counter, ask for the bill.. the lady at the counter asks me "do u like the hair cut?".. i say "bill please".. she says "Oh..u look really nice in that"..i am almost in tears. The bill comes to 500 bucks.. no comments..

Back in college... i fish for compliments.. i leave my hair open, swish it around like a horse's tail when it trots...nobody notices.. finally someone asks me "Oh.. you have colored ur hair.??"

I think i will have BP tablets with me the next time i go home to see my mom.

just spreading the good word...

ok.. this is not even trying to be funny.

i am just trying to increase your general awareness.. something about the dept of management studies in IIT-Madras and Samanvay, the B-fest we organised. do take some time out and read and if possible make others do so too..

http://www.hindu.com/2007/01/10/stories/2007011020150500.htm

http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/News/News_By_Industry/Services/Education/IIT_Madras_pots_90000_foreign_placement_offer/articleshow/msid-1085542,curpg-1.cms

http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/articleshow/1075463.cms
and the official site,

http://www.samanvay.iitm.ac.in/

thank you.

May I come in Sir???

To all the loyal and kind patrons of my blog (yes all 3 of u), maybe at times you have wondered 'does she actually lands herself in situations like these just so that she has something to put in the post??'....hmmph..precious little you know about me, i should say. If you think that i would take the trouble..the effort.. the time.. the audacity .. to be actually in places where I dont have any other go but goof up and make a total ass of myself to the delight of general public and embarrassment of friends (some less loyal ones pretend they dont even know me when out in public)..well i guess, i have to say, you are right.

I have no other logical (did i just use that word in my post? seems like i did.. heeeaaayyy) or even common sensical (oh boy! i am on roll now..) explanations to the stuff that keeps happening to me. not convinced?? want more proof?? oh yeah? oh yeah?? Well.. read on if you can take the truth..

For past few months now, i have been successful in shrinking my friends list in orkut by asking all and sundry for any kind of contacts in organization so that i could talk about my summer internship position with them. With enough pestering and blackmailing our class placement team members got me interview appointments with some firms as well... one of them was a leading automobile(2 wheeler) manufacturing company in India..

Day of interview
-----------------
I read up about the company.. learn to rot my introduction song and dance sequence... scratch my brain or what is left of it for something intelligent or seemingly intelligent question to ask them even if they don't give me a chance at the end of the interview.

My turn... I walk in confidently in high heels, blazer suit..i envisioned myself on the shop floor. men in coveralls working on the 2 wheelers in the assembly line around me. Sparks from the welding machine, sounds of hammers, spanners... I walk on, acknowledging smiles of respect and awe. There seems to be a commotion at the end of the assembly line. crowd parts for me.. It's the new model. something just doesn't seem to be right.. The ignition isn't turning on. I remove a hair pin from my swept-up hairstyle. Tweak some minor bolt or nut... n then press the ignition button.. the engine purrs into life.. applause....and handshakes.. i smile and wave...

Board room meetings. Big men with big pot bellies in dark suits. Major discussion over the new marketing campaign. Heated arguments. i stand up from my seat. Make my compelling argument. Applause and handshakes again...

"there seems to be some mis-communication".... back to earth and reality.. I see the interview panelist (IP) looking at me with a quizzical expression on his face..

me: duh...
IP: seems we haven't been successful in effective communication with your placement committee members
me: oh...
IP: we don't take lady candidates for summer internship positions.
me: huh..

He proceeds to wait patiently for 5 min, watching realisation sink through the non-porous matters in my head and finally dawn up on me.

IP: sorry for the trouble.. as you can see, there is no point in having an interview.
me: duh..
IP: have a nice day then.
me: Ok..

I walk out of the room. I see the next applicant looking expectantly at me. 'How was it?' he mouths.. 'Just great..maybe just a feeling, i think i am gonna make this one. Good luck anyways.'.. i say..


p.s. Cheers and champagne are in order. I did get procure summer placement. But not in the anti-woman company though. For an international electrical company's market research section in India.. hip hip hurraaaay..